Bad Relations
This meme is a tricky one to assess. It's not that it's wrong - I'm sound and self-contained in myself, happy and fulfilled in my interests and expertise - but that it merely hints at the real problem. Since human beings are social beings, requiring others for social and emotional suport, someone who is happily self-contained will always enjoy a freedom or happiness that is somewhat incomplete. It is indeed true that the problems and issues surrounding autism come in relations with others. Human beings need others in order to be themselves. The problem is that for autistic people relations to others can be difficult, awkward, and harmful. That's the autism paradox - autistic people need others to be themselves, but bad relations to others can do considerable harm. Simply, other people can be inconsiderate, insensitive, and downright nasty in their dealings with autistic people. To them, seeing the person and not the label means seeing the person and never the autism - there is no consideration, no respect, and no accommodation, only denigration and devaluation, based on the premise that autistic people are deficient human beings, not different, with unique qualities to value.
